Legwarmers? Really?

I've always harbored this deep-seated desire to be an earthy-crunchy mom. (**No offense to any "real" earthy-crunchy moms is intended here, I just don't have a better adjective at the moment.) A breast-feeding, baby-wearing, cloth-diapering mama who makes my own baby food. The kind of mama whose kid is always a scraggly ragamuffin with a big grin on his or her face as he or she jumps around naked in a mud puddle or plays with homemade wooden blocks while dressed in a mama-made woolly sweater (or hat, or pants, or scarf, or really anything woolly and handmade). The kind of mama who takes my infants camping or hiking and co-sleeps in a family bed in a big pile of happy, sleeping bodies.

I'm not sure where this comes from--probably a lot of it comes from my own mom, and the way that I was raised. I'm sure over the years I've romanticized my upbringing...a little girl dancing around at bluegrass festivals, sleeping in a old VW while everyone partied all night long, helping "build" our house, not being allowed to have any sugar for the first 3 years of my life, etc. Also, I know a lot of earth-mama type folks, and I think they're really cool.

Unfortunately, like many of my hopes and dreams, this one ended up being kind of half-assed when it came to putting it into practice.

First of all, I didn't breast-feed. Major, major earth-mama no-no.

We didn't co-sleep at all. Ella was a prickly, independent little thing right from the start. She's been sleeping in her very own bedroom since she was about four weeks old. Believe me, it was better for all involved. When we do have to share a bed, it's torture! Ben was a little different, but again, if he was sleeping with us, then we weren't sleeping. If you know my wife, Kat, at all, then you know this was a very, very, very bad thing.

Next, we aren't exactly organic farmers. Hell, we're lucky if we pop open a can of green beans for dinner. Broccoli or corn on the cob are delicacies over here. No wonder my daughter is a picky eater...it's like the old anti-drug commercials, "I learned it by watching YOU," the kid says in an accusatory tone to the screaming parents waving around a bag of pot. OOPS!

I did invest in some baby-wearing gear. We bought a Baby Bjorn. Then a Moby Wrap. Then a Kelty backpack carrier. Then an Ergo. I loved the Moby Wrap....when I remembered it. The stroller, although bulky, seemed to offer more convenience. A place to put my latte, a place to put the diaper bag....

Then, with Ben, I got into cloth diapers. When I say "got into" I mean, became OBSESSED. I tried all different kinds. I spend hundreds of dollars (wasn't this supposed to save us money?). I bought BabyLegs because I thought they would be cute and crunchy with the cloth diapers (and they were!). I became active on diaper-swapping websites. I used baking soda and vinegar to get my diapers clean. I dried them in the sun. I LOVED cloth diapering and was really sad when we had to stop. It was the closest I've ever felt to being a true earthy-crunchy mom.

Speaking of BabyLegs...these are leg warmers for infants, and the original point of this post. Easier to change the kid without getting him entirely undressed, I think. The packaging touts them as warmers for all--full legs, shins, arms...they probably would even work as headbands. I bought a LOT of BabyLegs, in fun girly colors for Ella. I mean, who wouldn't want to wear leg warmers?

(Here is another reason why I kind of fail as an earth-mama. I also secretly want my daughter to be the kind of kid who dresses up in quirky outfits and wears tutus and glittery sunglasses to the grocery store.)

She's NOT that kind of kid, and believe me, it's not from lack of trying on my part.

But every once in a while, she'll surprise me. Like today. T-shirt, bike shorts, and a full skirt. Then, leg warmers. In JULY. I think it's my fault because I told her she didn't need any socks, and we're going through some power-struggle issues. So she put on leg warmers, and wore them all day long.

(Secretly, I was amused and not embarrassed at all.)